Why Don’t the Deer Get Guns, Too?
(the first week of deer season in Pennsylvania)
I’ve been thinking that, during
hunting season, the deer should get
guns, too; and I’ll concede that they
wear the orange vests
for competition’s sake
I could be wrong, but to me it seems
the necks of deer are long and
marvelously muscled; we could
thus attach a gun (say, a snub-nosed
hunting rifle) that could be complexly
controlled by purposeful twitching
of organically-organized sinews
a sight lens could be connected from the
eye, the (aforementioned) orange vest
be slung, and now we have a proper
duel between hunter and the hunted
hunter and hunter, now
(hunted and the hunted)
do I mean this, no: and I’m grateful for
those (people) who hunt safely
and I understand that deer population
would otherwise be overrun
I simply want to offer a point
Intentionally, if in fancy dress (the
orange vest), that when we shoot
a gun, it’s highly, mortally probable
that someone might shoot back
clcouch123 
December 9, 2015 at 3:57 am
Oh. Great witty yet full of sense thoughts. It is nice to think the preys can be predators, too, sometimes.
December 9, 2015 at 5:59 pm
On balance, it seems fair.
December 10, 2015 at 4:24 am
It is!
December 9, 2015 at 1:55 pm
the answer: because they’re not allowed in gun shows?
that was dumb. BUT…in our city, which outlawed hunting decades ago…they are considering trapping deer and then killing them. Special sharp-shooters will be allowed to do the deed.
are you disgusted yet?
December 9, 2015 at 6:06 pm
I don’t know which (real) measure’s worse. Apparently, we have all these deer. Too many. Maybe we could send them to Canada with the wildernesses there. if the Canadians would want the deer. Or give them to the Inuit who would know better how to use them. I will say, though, that the hunters I know (I know, by luck, the better ones) are sober and safe when they hunt. And they use or donate the deer meat, afterward. Still, when I look at the beauty in deer eyes and movement–well, if I had to kill them, then we’d never have venison again. And we’d all have deer as close neighbors. Maybe that wouldn’t be so bad.
December 9, 2015 at 10:13 pm
The problem is they get in the highway and cause a lot of damage when they hit a car. I once had a deer with its foot caught in the highway fence behind my house, and when I found her I called the police…who asked me what I wanted him to do. Then he asked if I wanted the meat…I would have said yes but it was not feasible, so he called someone with the roads department…they have a list of people who want deer meat. Yes you are so right about the Inuits…in fact we have many of our own, who I’m sure would take them if it wasn’t so far away. My land abuts the highway fence, and we are in a rural area so we have a LOT of deer. I have several acres which is fallen trees and pastur area, and they spend a lot of time back there. I have a photo I took of a deer in my backyard. We also have coyotes around here…infact way East of Cleveland now as well.
December 10, 2015 at 1:51 am
I forgot to mention, Gradmama, that I like the idea of deer attending gun shows, too. I thought your point about that was clever and funny. I collided with a deer once, too. A shuddering experience, all around. I still wouldn’t kill deer, if that were left up to me. So maybe it’s good it’s not. You’re right, the deer are spreading out; they are numbering more around here, too. And we have more coyote, too, though I don’t know what they hunt or if they scavenge. Thank you!