still so dark still so dark remembering that it’s blue is all
practicing memory of daytime as it’s taken away
creeps back with the solstice yet we believe it is brief time with
victory enough in enduring days again
again like these to the north to the far south
prayer while frankly things are bad (though regardless could be daily)
God please forgive me help me in your timing I know though endurance with some endings along the way would really serve you know and of course you do
you love you know you help
and if invisible while suffering is real and so there seems a differences help me in this to undeceive my senses to that the paradox of evidence unseen and even life by death is understood
and with embraces here nonetheless looking elsewhere is it forward or more directions fully everywhere at last
the past few days at Brown and in Sydney (and the other places)
to have lost someone through murder to have lost a child a lover or a friend
or to know there is an absence a gap in what we knew with health was a totality of presence
school of learners
place where faithful gather
any place that should be easy to walk through where normal then became punishing insane
so much innocence and cowardice not perfection in the victims maybe worse for being any one of us
walking breathing now the smallest valley sliced in smooth land where we had been walking even if absently yet side by side
now only gone and in way that was horror and now how must we remaining get on
because we must we’re called to and we must call ourselves
and yet to face all there is to face to look within then at the world in what must be a teary way and then once scoured from the empty place
c l couch
At about 4:20 p.m. on a cold Rhode Island Saturday, a message from Brown University flashed up on cellphones all over campus — everyone should run or take cover from an active shooter. Hours later, horror erupted again, on the other side of the globe, as two gunmen sprayed bullets into a Hanukkah celebration on iconic Bondi Beach in Sydney. At Brown, two students were killed and nine others were injured. At least 15 people died at Bondi Beach, and more than three dozen remain in the hospital. . . . (CNN)
I prefer Christopher in conversation. In writing, I use C L Couch because it’s a genderless form of my name and, frankly, easier—I have severe writer’s cramp. I mean to be a poet writing spiritual and occasional verse. The photographs used permanently here—for the banner, for my profile—were taken by Debra Danielson, a photographer and friend. You may enjoy more of her work at debra.danielson.org. If you would credit me when quoting my work, I'd be thankful. As I am thankful for your presence here.
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