Holy Wednesday homework
sigh
Wednesday of Holy Week
a nothing day
third of
unfamous days
before
the rituals old and new
determined by a world or one’s
parish
or the way one has developed
over time
of expectation or endurance
of obligation
sigh
good
meaningful days if added
to the rest that must
go
on or goes on
anyway
add in hopes for chocolate
hardboiled eggs
and
ham
green artificial grass
that’s all
suburban passing but
might prayers go more intentional
for
the wars on
diseases
thieving of all kinds
among
these
theft of spirit of one kind
then
the other
pray for me
but while I’m praying
pray
for you
for needs I know
or
have kept away
by gesture
and
by habit
pray creatively
why don’t we
awkwardly
for lack of use applying our own words
but
it is Easter week and God’s hearing
might be understanding
flexible
and
you know
God gets it
anyway
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photo by Mathurin NAPOLY / matnapo on Unsplash
last place
vision shared
if I should get one more
to try
smallish place
but high with windows
please
then to set a circle out of chairs
lamps
here and there
so you may come to call
and
bring your friends
and we could talk of this or
that
of the word of God
in book and
in
the world
or what
to be praying for
when we have talked enough
on point
then
this intention
final chats
and
go
and I am at least a little pleased
that isolation goes
with some
condition for some company
while
on
that way
if no other closeness than the spirits
which should be close
enough
I know
though now I’d take more in the flesh as
any
might receive from
me
in this last
try
at home
though remember
but then one
or two
come by so we will sit
and
sip
and chat of
you know
anything
c l couch
photo by Jessica Christian on Unsplash
dearest friend
writing from a land-locked place
God
I turn to you for love
and I bring it
with me
not like yours except as a shell
with hopeful and stifling
stuff
inside
we could walk on the beach
early in the morning
while the same
seems most
shiny
and firm
and we could listen
we could
talk
we could listen
and would you hear me and appreciate
my hesitations
so that what is unsaid
could
finally be sent
and then the day would have to start
I guess
and we in it
though we could meet now
and then
even
on a bench to watch
the beach get
walked on
while
the shore erodes
then
night
and we could talk then
too
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photo by Ibrahim Rifath on Unsplash
resignation
there might be a good kind
God
where are you
I mean
in the flesh
please
in the God
or whatever form you take
to bring your presence
to us
to talk with us as you talked in the garden
or if a bush of
fire
is needed
well
the unconsuming kind doesn’t burn anything else
does it
I guess I’m asking
and we could talk
and if I deal
with abject
terror
I might remember that you talked this way
in a garden
with a naked couple
who were unashamed
and
I know a great deal has
happened
since then
but
God
I’d really like to know you
I’d really like to have
you know
a real conversation
my needs
well
they feel sharp today
and
you know there are problems elsewhere
too
and if we talked
and you gave me directions
then
I’d know how
to follow
though
I don’t how to build an ark
or lead anyone through any kind of
desert
but then
the orders you gave were new
to Noah
and
to Moses
or Deborah or Judith
who lived by calling and by prayer
and maybe found one through the other
which
I guess
means
something
for disembodies prayer
and
I so wanted to say
the books
the formal worship
aren’t enough
and
they’re not
but openness to ask and then to listen
or to listen to myself then ask
of you
I guess these could be enough
they would be like talking
like a conversation
after
all
sigh
all right
I’ll try
and though I could not wrestle with an angel
maybe
we could talk a little plainer
time to time
and I won’t ask for garden miracles
though
in the clouds or something
I could guess at least
in
something of
your presence
c l couch
photo by Alistair MacRobert on Unsplash
rich
(not Buddy though the music’s cool)
if I can’t
know God’s will
though I ask
then
maybe it’s not that I should give up
asking but
that I should change the asking
its parameters
per se
to know that God is there and hearing
and speaking as God might
in large and infinitesimal ways
and
I don’t get it
Well
I don’t
and can ask pardon for my not being attuned
but still wanting to serve
like Merton’s famous prayer
I guess
about not know direction but hoping
that a willingness to travel by approval
might
bring approval
even pleasure
from the Lord who
then
might speak if Thomas and I and all
who aren’t in synch
might go
not recklessly
since
we have our codes and liturgies
for attending and asking
best we can
formally
and then to stay in dialogue
the spirit of it
anyway
to say
like Tevye
maybe
that and to indicate at first
that it’s okay to talk
to ask
to guess and to complain
even to posit
being wealthy people
though wealth is relative by kind
and
degree and following
and maybe
wealth is having daughters and a village
on the edge
and
rich to have our lives in love and faith
you know
by God
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Thomas Merton’s well-known prayer begins: “My Lord God, I have no idea where I am going. I do not see the road ahead of me. I cannot know for certain where it will end. Nor do I really know myself, and the fact that I think I am following Your will does not mean that I am actually doing so. But I believe the desire to please You does in fact please You. . . .”
Buddy Rich was a famous, fantastic drummer.
photo by Vitalii Khodzinskyi on Unsplash
a freeing prayer
honestly
for
today by yesterday
and with a hope against
tomorrow
I can’t breathe
and
I can breathe poorly
while I hope you might regenerate
inhale
and exhale
by nature and by spirit
and
how all might work together
toward a happiness
from you
and then like angels
seek and take
our
earnest assignments
open
anywhere
and so
plea
prayer
toward affirmation that we’re made and that
we’re sent like missions
in love
inside
outside
growing
to reconnoiter
(Joshua and Caleb)
then
to service
fixing
a breaking world
by action understood
and
or
by stillness of hearts
amen
c l couch
(I’m afraid the state of my poor breathing is both earthly and spiritual; maybe you in the world with me have your ongoing challenges, labors from challenges as well)
photograph by Josh Applegate via Unsplash
untimed or mistimed time for prayer
(maybe in broken time)
God
I’m sorry
and I love you
not
sorry that I love you
and
you know what I mean
so that
should I need to say
and yet
the saying
matters
it’s on all the papers distributed
at church
so our participation
then
seems to be important
an issue of the following
to say
that we should say
or maybe think along
shall do
not
as a riddle or another game
but interaction
that is
serious as
sin
more so redemption
also
to pray for peace
from any state
of
readiness to ask or even
pledge a plan
we may or may not
have
ready to go
God
be with us wherever or
whenever
might
have to be as good as it gets
though
it’s in our purview alone to be thankful
for
small favors
while you have
the everything of everything to
care for
and to manage and should
our
words
ever mean so much
and
yet for love
and habit in the faith
it seems we carry
off
some
meaning in our making
and then our expressing
with
intention
as I
or we offer to you
now
c l couch
photo by Eugene Tkachenko on Unsplash
Egypt
church and Venezuela
prayer
and a song for peace
and
how much more to say except
a war without
our Congress calling it
and certainly without invasion
first
so we’ll need to be praying
all around
in
mourning for the losses
frankly
against the greed
and
vanity involved
with something about more terms
in
office
deceptively in play
wartime culture to manipulate
while in the church we’ll pray
and serve for
cessation
by the forgiveness and repentance
of
a nation
c l couch
photo by Eduardo Juhyun Kim on Unsplash
Morrocoy, Parque Nacional Morrocoy, Falcón, Venezuela
whose to know
I know you
as I
(existentially)
might know that goes
from
much to nearly
anonymous
as I don’t know you
and so
don’t know
what’s
healthy for you except generally
and to an extent
doctrinally
I hardly know
myself
it seems
and all the parts inside that work
well or that are inclined
yet
to rebel
not in
appreciable or creative ways
and so who am I to say
except I wish
for
wellness
I pray for healing of my niece
as I might know you
I pray
and encourage you to pray less blankly
more fully
(knowingly)
for what others and elsewhere need
also
you
and I guess that’s it
let’s pray
and might we know there’s power
in that
intercession
as well as
self-directed
if
could be with the proviso that
faith
hope
and love show up
by prayer
and anyway
and are willing to remain
first
two
the third especially goes nowhere
if all
imperfectly through us
and
perfectly from the one we know
and seek to know
even
through evidence unseen
yet
so believe
to ask
c l couch
(1 Corinthians 13:13, Hebrews 11:1)
photograph by Christina Ioannidou at Unsplash
Chamaemelum nobile.
Corinth, Greece
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