my friend’s surgery was “good” (friend’s word); now he’s recovering, the recovery being complex and uncomfortable
thank you for prayers and good thoughts; any such that could be offered or given toward recovery would be really appreciated—Christopher
2 poems that deal in prayer
what we ask
I sin
and God is with me
loving me
though not approving
I don’t think
I ask the psalmist’s ask
and will receive
not
because I’m David
or a prophet or
a choirmaster for the court
but because
I ask
and God is love
(say from Psalm 51)
in prayer
and
do we get what we ask
gee
I don’t know
though if I had to guess I’d
say
the answer’s yes
yes
we do
all
right
unless we ask for evil
or we make evil
sinful good
and so deceive ourselves and then
beseech
but
you know
God’s rather smart
having
invented smart
and though God’s old
there’s nothing feeble to typify
as
sometimes we stay keen
all the way through
and God
stay keen forever
having
invented keen
as well and also I believe that God
is
yes
old
but also as young
as young as now
so about asking
and
what we ask for tends to be good
which might
surprise
and so
we’ll get that
we will get
the good
c l couch
photo by Luise and Nic on Unsplash
I wrote this probably too hastily yet for verse I hope it is acceptable (receivable). If you have prayers and/or good thoughts to offer, I’d like to ask them for my friend who’s having his eye operated on today. Thank you so much.
heal my friend
Monday
my friend has an operation in
a few hours
it’s on an eye
and so
will not be easy or simple
at all
as in a week or so I’ll have a procedure
that is simple replacement of
an implanted device
been
gone through
once by me
and so many times through the people with whom
I consult
his operation’s hard as
well as complex
many stages to go through
and
then an uneasy time of recovery after
all goes well
that is
the hope
of course
if all were an eye
you know
and thankfully it’s not
we’re
not
but that is metaphor for Christian duty
while his
the actual need
for sight
God help him
keep him
guide the hands that serve him
and
frankly
like asking for my niece because I don’t your will
precisely
so please heal her
please heal my friend
in
part out of
plain direct
praying
shall we ask for what’s clear and toned by
careful notes and leave
the gray notes
out
gathered by the single one who with angels
serving
knows rightly
how to play
well
everything
every song for every purpose
under
heaven
c l couch
1 Corinthians 12:17
“If all were an an eye, where would the sense of hearing be?”
photo by Murray Campbell on Unsplash
the poet-friend
I heard it from a poet
once
that there was no following
because
grace was dispensed
by
those who claimed authority
to give it
and
by their terms
I’m imagining a water-cooler with
a foreign hand on
the tap
a line that goes away
from
there of those to drink
who
are bestowed with an upside-down
triangle of a cup
inside
of which are stips of official
pardon and
toward
the price of another metaphor
a ticket
to
the show
while grace if free
and
has no agency but God
if I may say
three parts to
one
with grace soaring everywhere
and everywhere it’s
needed
to cover and to heal as
that song-balm
the sin-
sick soul
and why not fly by music
of
the spheres
an angel chorus to announce
and
to remind us
freely given is the love and salvation
of the Lord
and
is the vision made
the poetry
perverse
and I don’t know but that it’s better than
the tyranny of will that despots
try
and yet prohibited by better will
and inside each
of us
a part
as if to fuse with our own
elements
our spirits to
save
grace
angels
our own will
and we are saved
if
against the world
and
those disillusioned and me
angered in
their
favor for who dispenses
grace
and blessing but
the Lord
and not the red
and black
the gold of breaking majesty
while
what we have
on our own
even alone if need be
faith
and love
forever
freely
grace like justice flowing
even better
c l couch
photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash
the road
I have a friend who got
to walk the trail
across northern Spain
the Camino
that
takes one to Compostela
I can imagine only
though
she affirms
the discoveries
and changes
it is a dark day here
the streets
are
dull
c l couch
photo by Mor Shani on Unsplash
sometimes nature agrees
and it’s a gray day
upon gray
though I promise you
the sun came out when
my friend had
good news to share
c l couch
photo by Jake Gard on Unsplash
on snowy evenings
an early evening when
sleet pings on the window pane
behind me
while I write
and try to write
to say something not likely
pithy
yet a touch
maybe to a point
and to
confess it
or to let
the setting like
the season stand alone
the dark and cold and icy rain I know
and thinking of a friend’s
father
who died last night
surrounded by faithfulness
it seems
and yet
I’m sad for her
and maybe I should let the night before
and the night behind me
do the talking
now
about
what feels separate and
in faith
might not be
a union shown by fact
someday
c l couch
photo by Anastasia Zolotukhina on Unsplash
Love andGainLoss
I don’t know
How are we honest
About loss
We feel it
We feel the
Not-the-presence from what is
No longer there
It’s rather plain
All the small things
That don’t quite work right
Anymore
Or at least don’t work
The way they used to
When
What is missing now
Was there
But then
The missing is another
Something
Too
It has been added
And we’re supposed to deal
With less
Than we had before
I don’t know
The paradox of
Loss and gain
Or
Loss and loss
Escapes me for compassion
Even in
A philosophy
Of love
Which is the “love”
Part
Of the “love of wisdom”
Though love might say
With philosophy
Or away from formal justifying
That everything should be embraced
What we have
What we no longer have
(I know
like hugging
a phantom
somehow)
Well
My friend is gone
And other friends are gone
And something of good
Feeling’s
Gone as well
Though ironically
(and paradoxically)
I suppose
We may need more such feeling
In these times
All right
No supposing
This is when we say
God
Of goodness
Help us through this time
For you are author and sustainer
Of everything beneficent
Plus
The way
(you show the way)
To deal with
What happens
And is
Injurious
The answer as in all things
Must be love
And love somehow in
The inquiry
As well
Which is added
To the present pain
In
Our reasons for it
Any of it
Plus the lack thereof
(of reason)
Clearly
Then
We go back and forth
And not so clearly
Why the loss
Even why
In the first place
Love
Knowing
And not knowing
Love is the means
The resorting
The resource
And was
At first
And shall be last
The seal
Our pledge
That is
An answer
With a reason
From
The start
And now even
Our gratitude
To go on
Positive
And with
Anticipation
C L Couch
(on the death of a friend)
Photo by Kseniia Rastvorova on Unsplash
gospel according to Douglas
what is the loving thing
to do
what my evangelist friend
would say
as a good question
annoying question
sometimes
even daunting
when we
want
the unloving thing
to do
because we’re jealous
or frankly covetous
wanting something we have turned
into an object
(or an object)
or
(with regard to envy)
we want something
or else
in someone else
to go away
none of this
is loving
not even of
oneself
that does not need the plans
and then the consequences
of success
in those
an ersatz love
a bent love
to be honest
if honesty
be first casualty
in twisting
the better parts
in what we want
what is the loving thing
to do
not weighed
down
except in service
though there's rest
that is
the sleep
comes after
for the day
for the life
c l couch
(Douglas was an evangelist friend of mine who consistently said to ask, and act, on that as the first question or the one to which we might repentantly arrive, later)
photo by Melanie Lim on Unsplash
Food distribution in a pandemic.
published on December 28, 2020
To a New Friend
You asked me
how I am,
and I didn’t tell you.
I didn’t know
how to be succinct
or how much you’d like to know,
though I have no reason to
doubt your sincerity
in asking
except I haven’t been that well:
I’ve been tired and rather ill.
And the doctors mention,
if only to mention,
the timeline for a transplant
and that I’m not getting any younger,
as we say.
And I’m concerned:
I worry
while living through the day,
awake at night,
half-awake the next day.
Maybe you have insight;
or maybe I would simply like—who
am I kidding—cherish
your responses that so far have been
both sympathetic
and intelligent
as an impressive combination,
though there won’t be anything unless
I say something.
C L Couch
Photo by Mel Poole on Unsplash
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