2 haiku about the seasons
the spring the winter
autumn summer seasons are
negotiated
green brown warm silver
blue cold red orange umber
cool yellow gold hot
c l couch
photo by Joshua Fuller on Unsplash
(n.b.)
I’m sorry
but
here’s a chapbooklet
for Friday or whenever
no time
any time
sorry
this is where I walked
and now we walk
(as
Everypeople)
as far as grace permits
in the distance
yet
come closer
there is the nearest thing to house
that was a home
a room
blue walls
plaid textures
(to
recall)
and my rough way
(as all)
through adolescence
earlier
there had been sleepwalking
I remember
waking in the black-tiled bathroom
and on the stairs
of
neutral color
I also remember crying
at night when the ceiling fan
bit thing
in
the hall
must be turned off
I don’t know
standing for some king of peace
perhaps
now I remember
reaching down for something then rising
hitting my head upon a rail
drawing blood
but
because it was a late dark time
trying to leave it all
alone
in the black bathroom
anyway
where it would be easier to do any cleaning
then
or later
so
maybe there were demons then
maybe it pursues me
still
chases and sometimes
must catch
far in experience
in memory like a spell and also
now
and is there exorcism to
relive
or any riddance trying for
that older
and smarter
for all the times
it passes with currents
such as blood
within
and also getting out
so very much
too hurt
too angry
for a child and a teen
and for the since
the growing up
once
grown
sigh
come closer in
to remember
to embrace
what
to keep
(closer in)
what to be rid of for
the time remaining
inside the seven days
inside
the seven days in May
of a good story
when
we challenged everything
we thought
we did well in black and white
then
realized we had missed all
the grays
between
at least like Fail Safe
we did not
begin
to blow up ourselves
or like the other
story
in which we finished off
ourselves on
Earth that
time
(Seven Days in May, movie 1964 based on novel 1962; Fail Safe, movie 1964, novel 1962; Doctor Strangelove, movie 1964, novel Red Alert 1958)
mood swing music indigo
(brief retrospective)
1
dance
to syncopation
first
time
jazzy gospel gets us
started
but approaching war-time
swing
music must
take over
and in how many lands
the heavy boots
on time
were overwhelming but could not
sublimate
there being resistance
(always)
in these cases all the counter-steps
meaning freedom
from the jacks
2
a way to swing through the Depression
to believe
in something new
as old
had failed with
Hoover
then with Chamberlain
in Europe
where the shadow rose
and light was
hiding itself
against
the Bible strategy
and
so too weak to withstand
gray
and black
and all the death to music
it went for
3
now we’re here
the music spilling everywhere
without
foundation
though days cannot help
but be based on
the days
before
and resolution or the lack
if any
even without jazz-resolution
so that
all to hear
to dance to
is
not jazzy
only moody only
indigo
unchurched
what is thoughtful
what is faithful
to share
to share the love of God
though we only know our own
no better
maybe no worse
that if hale at all
in spite of veniality
or
the mortal kind
at least
is something to try more so
than other
alternatives
hatched in other places
by
other kinds than the source we
may not know
yet’s on the move
regardless
fail safe
what is
safe
why
nothing when the lion
offers comfort
folded inside the fur
warm-blooded
muscle
and it’s the thing
the beast
that
when beast
tears with the claws we knew
were there
but wanted to be folded into
something
warm
and strong
air
water
land
certainly fire
all have bifold natures
and allowances
and then
the things with choices
angels
of both kinds
and us
you know
with everything a resource
for decision
by the numbers
by the numbers
I think I watched once
someone
paint that way
I was impressed
in
something bright and
sonorous
(maybe there was music
near)
covering plain
numbers
even accurate
and with
a certainly and yet near the lines
an aching wildness
of beauty
in which
to work
I know I could not do it
if admiring
the product
though
I must admit I lean toward abstract
for appreciation
then penultimately yours
it’s Friday
compose well
this day
even plans to recreate
or plan not
to plan
to play
breathe easy between actions
as if
in intermission
before the act
go in
for many it’s a weekend
plainly
so work
and look forward
then
to have it
a comedy perhaps
to play through
c l couch
photo by Vinicius Duarte on Unsplash
matters for prayer
(I should know there are always these to express)
sigh
so what do I have to say
if anything
right now
or in the hours to come
I give myself the day off as an
option
that some readers might not mind
the break to take
from
the entwinements
I could speak of God
for us
and I do pray for you
for us
although
I have no added insight at the moment
to the prayer
there is a wildfire
nearby
I mean
in my county
so I know the location
the forest I have driven through
and hiked in
and stayed
the place
of a human tragedy of note
(meaning it’s
marked)
from some decades ago
and while containment has been accomplished
the burning still goes there
and for
some days now
so that’s the occasion
looking for an occasion
and here’s
the spiritual part
a prayer
as
dear God
cover the firefighters and
other fighters and supporters
with care
to keep them
cool
(if possible)
and safe
(that by you is)
encourage those who had to leave
as they return
to face the changes
in damage
or simply facing the new way
things must be considered
now
not that we shouldn’t always be aware
of fragilities
and dangers
but
well
who does that all the time
no matter how exigent the living
cool
(if possible)
and safe
(that is)
please
and thank you
amen
so I said this and if you’d like to join
that would be gracious
and so
a prayer for you
and us
in that
dear God
please hear us when we speak to you
and you do
of course
but it is human to speak to you
the way we do
even the way we’re taught
grant calmness of night
and if that can’t be
so
then allow some source of calm within
that we might access
if only can a little
help us to be together
in the new day
together as in self-knit and then
joined with each other
the togetherness
in which
there’s greater hope that the day not only be
endurable
but also good to think about
to feel
and mostly to live through
peace
and union
and
our differences
amen
yes
I prayed this for you
for us
as with the other
c l couch
photo by Harrison Steen on Unsplash
fanciful yet intentional verses about night
vampyr
the life I live these days
as one
no sleep at night
but rather after dawn
insomnia
stress from above
the hours at night are clear
and
frankly
I want them
so no pointy things around me
please
I’m still so tired all the time
I’m sure I’d pierce some part of me
with those
at 11:11
a time for me and God
a time
that
God approves
a small thing between us
two
something the world shouldn’t
mind
or try to
take away
maybe you have your times
throughout the day
that
read specially to you and the one
protecting
all
our intimacies
evening drive
the rain is romantic
I can go by houses lighted for night
pretend the yellow lines are clear
drive past the occasional
driveway
sometimes pretending one
or another
could
be mine
c l couch
photo by Amir Borhan on Unsplash
something to say to God, something to you
say what
I think I should
say something to God today
not about
the weather
which is
fine
about the tree out the window
and across the street
that looks as if it’s bearing
snow
that are the blossoms back
for spring
I should say thank you
for
new growth plus
reminding winter in
a romantic way
thank you
a wish is all
I hope this is a good
day
for you
maybe a day of extra goodness
in the eccentric
way
I thought it was Thursday
when it’s
Wednesday
an extra day in which all sorts
of added goodness
might
take place
and I hope it happens
for you
c l couch
photo by Paran Koo on Unsplash
2 poems while thinking about Easter
Aslan again
was re-maned
once rising
with all wounds save mild scars
now
unremembered
new life
new joy
wanting to roar
and so roaring
and then playing
with
the children
on a hillside
where rolling
descending and ascending
make
sense
in mortality
again
(recalling that passage in The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe)
green-grass Saturday
made of plastic
even though there’s cheer
in memory
said memory to find itself in corners
through
the coming year
once making beds
to dye the eggs with vinegar
hot water
everything is nestled
for a while
and
as of yet
no chocolate has appeared
though we are
ready for the hunt again
on Sunday
for the same eggs
now
we cannot find
and then the chocolate
and there will be photographs
appearing of the day
and
of the day again
then in pastels
off
to church
c l couch
photo by Birger Strahl on Unsplash
chapbooklet for wrapping up the workaday week
(should you work this kind of week with its work days)
Guide
I’ve been on trails
And there were guides
And other sites
With guides
Though Mammoth Cave
Through the National Aquarium
I thought I’d like to be a guide
And applied
And got the job
Fort Necessity
But
Too far away
And I was unwell
And so stayed put
Sigh
We think of guides
They do their jobs and then
We put them
Aside
To lead our guideless lives
Except
By ourselves
And anyone who tells us what
To do
And we obey
Or otherwise we go along
Conductoring
I like conducting
I discovered rather late
I have good sense of rhythm
And a good
Sense of pitch
I have directed groups
But did not have the chance
Realities
Subsuming
To get the training I would need
To do it and be taken
Seriously
So I do the phantom thing
As others do
Conduct when no one’s looking
There might be music on
Or all the pieces
All the voices
All the movements
In my head
Southpaw
I am left-handed
Which
Yes
I’m told means I live
In my right mind
Statistically
(I suppose actuarially)
I
Understand
We lead shorter lives
Up to
Five years less
Which seems unfair
For all the terrific baseball-pitching
We
Provide
Guidance Counselor
I think that God guides
Though I’m not sure
Although
Before my doubt should intervene
My instincts
Worldly
Ego-driven
Take over all the choices
Sometimes I withhold
The choice
Long enough to hear
Or note the tug
Of the angel voice
Or pull
To indicate
This is what I should
Do
Where I should go
So I don’t know
It’s not
Negotiation
For we’re not in any
Way
In equal places
Equal parts
And yet
It matters how I listen
How
I respond
My decisions
(predestination notwithstanding)
Seem
To matter
Which might we say
From time to time
To listen to
Your know
The better angels
The other ones
Fallen like us
And yet for that kinship
We must look
To rise
Like the ones who fly
Roll of Thunder
First the lightning
Then the crash right after
Lightning
Close
Then the count took place
Increased
As hours passed
Flashes
Persisted
Though the numbers
Said the lightning had moved on
Inside
No lights flickered
Which
In a dismal state
Added balm to despair’s
Ennui
We Are Closed
(open to what’s next)
The hours close in
The last of the workweek
In my
Current culture
There will be a kind of ending
Paced by exhalations
As we leave
Where we have been for
Hours
Naturally enough
And on our way
(exhaling)
Toward home
Or pubs
Or whatever satisfied
Distracts
Over the connotative weekend
C L Couch
Have a splendid weekend!
(should you have the weekend)
Photo by Hasan Almasi on Unsplash
a two-part matter of monsters
monsters
monster means something important
out for show
but we know monster
really
for ourselves and
also monstrous
connotation
and old scary movies
and before that
illustrations here and there on paper
though mostly
through
stories
the monster that we see outside
and
do not see
the gruntings or the screams we think we
hear
there is what goes into
and has always been
inside
the mind
monsters worse that in there
rise
sometimes in sleep
or we take them waking into
feeling
thinking
the spirit
the ego
our inner things fed one way or another
and then become
our conscious
if monsters not-consciously influence
‘til
they’re
known
maybe through counsel
maybe we learn to drag the beasts from
deep lurking
into a shallow sunlit place
where they
are known
and
let
awareness both appreciate as well as
eschew
all monsters
doubting
they do not go away
so we’ll pursue
and
come to know in unshadowed time
and circumstances
live with
then
the monstrous as
best
(not beast)
as we may
monstrous negotiation
maybe that’s how I’ll leave it
a discussion
for
the day
of what’s monstrous
what are the beasts that lurk away
or want
to invade
and also the shaded things
as creatures
that
we keep inside
the world
certainly can
be
a bestial place
look at D. C.
and also western Asia with points
west
and east
until except for penguin colonies
the Earth is subsumed
by
all the monster presences
and possibilities
and we think monster-hunting will
resolve
except the monstrous will not like it
and might attack
or simply
push
tall and deadly things from
the forests in
our way
the forest out there
and
of course
the woods in here
the fairytale monsters
point
toward us while
reading or
otherwise receiving
and while they
return
and so we have more stories
maybe there’s
a matter of negotiation
that
only lately
except for Androcles
the narratives are positing
that
we make friends
with dragons
and
so ask Saint George to consider new
pursuits
that we bargain with ourselves
as well
and the clawed and jagged creature-parts
dwelling
deep
but changing moods
and agendas near and over the surface
to outside
and
then each other
rather
to learn the monsters
that
we won’t need to feed them
they’ll be fine
and teach us in return
that what is
monstrous
needs no encouragement
but
in appreciation
then
of everything we are
chastened
we step into the waters of the world
all the currents
even
caves once knowing
what inhabits
there
in me
in you
so us
and in them
until the them be us as well
c l couch
photo by steffen wienberg on Unsplash
“Same Old,” “Same New,” two poems about faith and doubt (or doubt and faith)
Same Old
I’ve written
On these themes before
And sorry for
The repetition
Sometimes
I know
And deal in the same
The seasons
Say
Because these things wear well
At least on me
Like shoes that fit
At last
Or stories that we like
To tell
The substance of Dad
Jokes
No doubt
But here I deal
Because
I must confess that some things get
To me
Which might be sole motivation
For
Classic-worthy writers
(like the class that earns
gold medals)
but
Sometimes I fear as well in addition to
The trouble
Heartless
Of the intellect
Where do we go
And why the lack of permission
To know
I could take gnosis or agnosis
I suppose
But beyond
Secret knowledge
And the memberships
How do we
Know
As anyone
To know for
Real
When even feelings of assurance
Fail
While our God says
Through lore
That God loves us
And wants
If not aches
For all of us be joined with God sometime
Well
The testimonies that we have
Discuss doubt
Even in those right before the Lord
Not
For us
From ages past
Hmm
Maybe there’s something there
In I believe
Help my unbelief
The
Salvation formula clearly given
And yet
One must admit to doubting
Even in the face
Or by the words of
God
Moses
Miriam
Others
With the loving parent brought before
The Christ
In order for the child to be healed
And told
Believe
Is all
And must say to Christ
I believe
And I don’t believe
And I must ask you to help me
In the second
Maybe both
And then
You know
Without a test
(a further test perhaps)
The child is healed
Mark 9
You can Thurber-look it up
Yet there is doubt
To read
And doubt
To have
And finally the doubt beneath the doubt
Like the last temptations
We have heard
About
The final doubt that maybe all
Must face
In that all this of faith is real
With the results
Rewards
Perhaps
Truly
Taking place
And for faith we are heaven-sent
And then heaven-arrived
I believe
Help my unbelief
We come from God
We go to God
No doubt
Same New
And why
Should it have to go this way
Maybe not
If there were no
Postlapsarian
Maybe unfallen
Our impulse would be clear
That we are here
To tend
A garden
And each other
Build a planet
With
Because we have
Approval of the Lord
Maybe Love divine
All loves
Excelling
That with will
We go the first way
The way set up
The way
Hoped for
By the creator who must weep
Maybe turn angry when
We go the other way
The way
Of life we know
We have
Regardless of our knowing
Even
Rather mindlessly
Living for the self and for
Enough freedom
To live
In hard times
Or
Take despot-like because
Soft
Times are desired and
We might get away
With that
For those aware of virtues
To follow or
Desist
For those facing temptation
To give in
Or resist
Well
We could be puppets of the Lord
And
We are not
And there are consequences
To the will
We choose with harder judgments on
Those who steal choices
From others
And notions of paradise are fine
Truly fine
But cannot be realized here
Or any institution
Since
All things collective are inhabited
After all
By us
The way we are
And so paradise is distant
So distant as to be unreachable
Before
An afterlife
When and where
Forgiven things are not
Extant and the honest life put down
Is raised
To live inside
A new
And everlasting
Trend
Sigh
Outside of Eden
Where it’s hard
Though
Maybe we’d have had hard work
For perform in there
With
The work meaning delight
For
The change from how we treat work
Have work treat us
Now
Well
We live now
And may look forward
Toward something beyond
A worldly end
To something
Perelandra-like
Means
Both a willful and
Sinless life
Even
A planet’s existence
Decided
The right way from Eden
C L Couch
Perelandra, novel by C. S. Lewis; “Love Divine, All Loves Excelling,” hymn by Charles Wesley; Mark 9 in the Christian New Testament; “You Could Look It Up,” short story by James Thurber
Photo by Paolo Bendandi on Unsplash
BELIEF (for translation)
Lyon, France
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