How Much God-Complaining Is Allowed
And how does God love us
Well
Perfectly
To start
But it’s so frustrating
Where is the fruit
That rightly comes
Each year
We have waited
Through the brown
And white
And green seasons
Now it’s gold
But you don’t offer
Anything like guarantees
Of harvesting
For faith
You even excoriate
The wealthy
And leaders
Over living well
And
Yes
On taking
Keeping
Hoarding
From the rest
Tossing the peeling
While
Chewing through the fruit
Okay
Maybe you don’t do that
But what do you do
What is promise
And the bounty
From believing
We can’t even see you
Hear you
Touch you
Taste you
And what is left
Smell you
Like incense
That we use divine
In churches
Rising up
As if you were there
To take the tendrils
As requests
While we hope
And choke
(sometimes)
For needful
Responses
Well and good
And not so good
We have to wait
We cannot see
Or hear
And all the rest
And yet you are perfect
Perfect love
Where is that
Please
We need it
(sorry)
Obviously
We’re hungry
We’re thirsty
We’re too much on our own
And where are you
But here somehow and
Please
Show up with parcels
Please
Of all we need
All we need assuage
All we need consume
For life
Even if
We have poor understanding
What that means
Which
Of course
Is why we ask for you
Please show up
I need you
God
Please show
C L Couch
Photo by Lin Leyu on Unsplash
simply setting the scene
midsummer introit
a month from now
I guess
is
summer
or midsummer
by tradition
and assemblies
in the evening
with the fireflies
attending
and
berries
also in their time
afterward
for nourishment
‘til autumn
with better-known
celebrations
then
c l couch
photo by Padre_moovi on Unsplash
God Out
What shall we
Draw God into
Not that
It is too unsavory
Distasteful
Don’t you know
Not that
It would be unseemly
To have divinity
Involved
Even to know
Well
Not that
Either
It’s too ugly
And profane
And we think sex
Is involved
And not that
For it was murder
Yes
Between adults
But still
The wrong thing for a
God to see
And to be known
For participation
In such things
But
Yes
Well
God knows all
Sees all
Hears through everything
All walls
Even anything
We pull up for a barrier
And yes
God’s dealt
With murderers
As well as
Thieves
And liars
And
By the way
God knows everything
About sex
Even the aberrations
So
God
Could be involved here or
There
Which means
We’ll need new excuses
For God’s
Exclusion from
Our ugly troubles
C L Couch
Photo by Raghavendra V. Konkathi on Unsplash
Poor (not as in bad but as in not having) Prayer, Real Prayer—2 poem-prayers
Poor Prayer
Dear God
I’m too pent up
And that’s not healthy
I’m also poor
And could not buy my way
Out of anything
Or even have
The coat I want
Care for my feet
Or shoes
Though you gave me
What you gave me
And keep giving me
Though I’m uncertain
What that is
Not doubtful
But uncertain
For somehow
I know things
A few things
Anyway
But not enough
For sureness
As I breathe
And as I think
And as I move
At last
Into the day
I do understand
You give
With or without expectation
Or do I simply manage
Through the hours
As I may
As I can
With what I have
And like the other poor
With what I must say
I don’t have
Real Prayer
Sigh
What I’m blessed
I do not know
There’s the morning sun
Yellow on green
And branches
Is that
Are these
Gifting for me
Because I’m the only one
Looking out these panes
At this time
Or is there more
Or less
And how are we blessed
Anyway
Not through things
Through gilded anything
(I pause
to drink
and honestly
am grateful for the drink
against the times
that poverty
or sickness
kept coffee from
me)
Or property
That is the Earth’s
Though we believe we’re claimants
Well
The wealthy
Or the mortgage-ridden do
Or could
(I’m not sure
how much possessiveness
they feel)
So what is ours
And what are we blessed with
From your hand
And your say-so
Might we own
Pieces
Of a whole
Or simply lent them
And then leave them
Which seems
The wider lesson
From the form
That living takes
And then
What do you want us
To do
In this next hour
And day
And the life
As a campaign
But to do
Justice
Says your book
And to walk humbly
By the way
And what is that
Are these
Except we know a code
Delivered from a mountain
While we waited
By dancing
Before idols
Though we could
Dance for justice
And humility
I suppose
And do you think
Would you approve
And
Allow for our confusion
Our mistakes
Even our flaws
Until we get them right
Which might
Take all our mortality
Of energy and time
Though
As a God
You will stay with us
I suppose
Even a judge
Should have to watch
And listen
Before judging
Well
I know there’s love in there
Forfending errors
Allowing for the pardoning
Of sins
And moving on
With you
Further abstractly
Farther even physically
On Earth
And in the universe
We observe
And only push our pins
Into
So love us as we move
And when we’re still
Even remembering
Our virtues
Or our lack thereof for pardon
Then to set us on our way
Or leave us to it
As we may
And bidden
You’ll be with us
Ornery
Obstinate
Aggrieved
Trying again
Amen
C L Couch
Photo by Nikola Knezevic on Unsplash
(the thing about an archway is that you go through it—CLC)
Less Home
The homeless
That could be me one day
That in my scared
Times
I do think of this
Hard to believe
The photographs of these
Are romantic
Depictions
Sometimes inside
Shelters
Sometimes with food
Also clothed
Sometimes with pets
Or studies in textures
Impressive
Even beautiful
But there’s the real
In the city
Or the town
In the square of some collection
Of us
Otherwise
Invested
And here she is
And he
And collectively they are given things
And also physically moved
When the homed
Are tired of them
Officially
Anxietous
Over values
Of properties
And landmarks
And how
Frankly
The homeless look
Against all style
And smell
Against all savory
Eating places
Sometimes they get boxes
As they find them
Mostly
Sometimes they want
To claim their own
Out of the nothingness
They own
Sometimes we try to find them
And I wonder if
Anyone would look for me
And what if I were found
And would I want
To be
So much lack of anything
Except for fullnesses
Of fear
Of shoes and socks
And clothes
Against the weather
And the weather
Fear of the next hour
Over what
To do
When not worrying
Over food and
Drink
And where to shower
And this could be me
Though for now
I can’t appreciate
Development
Or is it
Evolution
To this state
And any consideration
Of the length of time
To live this way
Until hopeless repetition
Becomes only
The hopeless
C L Couch
I wrote of home and then it seemed unfair not to consider homelessness; maybe the homely (classic meaning) part will be posted another time.
Photo by Barb McMahon on Unsplash
formless supplication and God what shall I say to you but help like the Beatles I suppose or anyone inside a boat with water pooled and seeming to rise help and bring some rags and a life preserver the dry-land versions this time and I don’t know what that means and I hope that that’s all right praying for formless things nonetheless to assist because I know you’re not a genie and this is not a trick with a lamp or the words for what I want to get them right or be fooled in what I’m getting or not and I like the raven or the spider in the story but you are not a trickster though you allowed tricks upon yourself with a kind of king for a day and then the awful truth falling on you by the end in a darkened noisy afternoon I’m sorry I’m simply asking for your help and in the grace of it not knowing what that help should be and does it count lack of specificity and I think it might c l couch photo by Martin Brechtl on Unsplash
A Last Couple of Things
We went
To the church
Flea market
Taking things
And returning with more in
Number
Than we brought
We went to see Penzance
At the movies
The film
With Kevin Kline
And Linda Ronstadt
Rex Smith
And George someone
(if I say
I’m going to say it
wrong)
And the characters of cops
Who moved so fluidly
In dancing
As if the vertebrae
Could be so
Flexible
So sinuous
And that is what
I can recall
Though maybe there was more
But this is difficult
You understand
One
Two
Of the harder
Pleasant
Things
There are to recall
Then she relapsed
And finally was
Still
Fit for heaven
Finally
Though she had proved
Potential
Aptitude
And skill
Long before
Faith
Long ago
While in our mortal days
C L Couch
Photo by Ricky Turner on Unsplash
One of the Least
I’m sorry
But
I feel badly for
The goats
Though I suppose
We should
Think of them
Like the Dwarfs in Narnia
In the last
Battle
Which is not
To think of them
At all
For their will
Leaves them behind
While we run on
To real
After-judgment
Narnia
But what if we
Had fed
The goats
Clothed them
Visited them
In prison
And was that all for naught
Nothing worthwhile
Investing
For their intransigence
Regarding
Faith
Beyond what was the walls
They knew
I don’t know
Presuming
We who do the asking
Are all sheep
As well
And are we saved
So securely
Well
Yes
We are
Which is not the issue
Being that
Of superiority
Of calling
And of giving
In that
We can’t guarantee
A thing
For an outcome
And
Don’t bother trying
Keep giving
With the basic things
Maybe the abstract
Sometimes
Should the goats
Want
A conversation
I don’t know
Poor goats
I’m sorry
Poor sheep
Too
I guess
For knowing
And for loving
A goat
Or abstractly
All the goats
Matthew 25:31-41
C L Couch
Photo by Devon Wilson on Unsplash
2 poems
(about God and self, I guess, though, you know, you will find what you will find)
Freely
And there is God
Who first believed in us
First made us
Before we
Set out
Inventing
Re-inventing
Ourselves
Finding the words
We will be known by
If known at all
The looks
Our posture
Whatever
As if creation were a game
Of changing jerseys
Even affiliations
When we can get away with that
Elide expectations
To something like our own
Satisfactions
Who knows
Maybe aligned
With how that God
Had made us
With our natures
Toward our inclinations
Regarding expectations
Heaven-sent
Rather than
Always
Earth bound
Hours
Not much
For a Monday
I’ll admit
Frankly
Tried to sleep with back pain
Then woke up
Heavy on my leg
Under the other
But I breathe
I imagine you are breathing
Too
And there is a day ahead of us
To try
To sleep
Perchance to dream
(well
isn’t that what came to mind
honestly)
Or more importantly
Work out our dreams
Or if need be
Exchange them
For something good
It is to wear
To walk
To recline
To move through the world
And what we have for home
What works well
For a life
With potential satisfaction
Meaning
Faith
Pleasure
And hopes even high
For this and into the next
Hour
C L Couch
Photo by Tristan Colangelo on Unsplash
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